Contestants Flap Their Wings at Mullet Festival

The Mullet Festival returned to Stan’s Idle Hour in Goodland this past weekend, bringing a capacity crowd of revelers for the unrefined, down-home pleasures of drinking, carousing, listening to loud music, and judging the Buzzard Lope competition.

Tucked away outside the Marco city limits, but still on the same island, Goodland is the self-proclaimed “drinking village with a fishing problem” with a way more laidback vibe and relaxed attitude.

This was perhaps the chilliest weekend ever for the Mullet Festival, but a crowd still thronged Stan’s on Sunday afternoon for the climactic event, the Buzzard Lope dance-off and the crowning of the Buzzard Queen. Judging from field observations, the spectators were self-medicating with copious doses of antifreeze, and a party atmosphere prevailed. Leading up to the competition, the Shane Duncan Band from Ft. Lauderdale entertained with rock and roll, country classics, and even Michael Jackson hits such as “Pretty Young Things” and “Billie Jean.”

Longtime emcee Jeff Hilt, with his wife Sharon doing the serious organizational work, started the proceedings by bringing up a chorus line of past Buzzard Queens, warming up the crowd for the seven contenders for this year’s title. He cautioned the contestants: “This is a family establishment,” which is true in the extended family sense, including those crazy cousins. “Any ‘wardrobe malfunctions,’ and you will be immediately disqualified and escorted off the premises,” he warned. It was a little chilly for that, in any event, but some of the queen hopefuls did manage to show a bit of skin.

The theme song for the event is “The Buzzard Lope,” by Stan’s Idle Hour namesake Stan Gober, the restaurant’s founder and longtime frontman, who passed away in 2012.

“Flap your wings up and down, take steps around and round,” say the lyrics in the verse, instructions to the dancers who every year compete to be named Buzzard Lope Queen, repeated over and over by Hilt as the band played. “Looks like she’s on dope – she is doin’ the Buzzard Lope,” as the would-be queens gyrated and flapped their wings.

Wardrobe for the dancers featured Mardi Gras masks, feather boas, and often cowboy boots, and the judging, based on volume of crowd applause, clearly emphasized the importance of enthusiasm. By the time the contest was done, the stage was littered with multi-colored feathers, and a new Buzzard Queen had been crowned.

The dancer who garnered the loudest applause, Sue Muisse of Gloucester, Massachusetts, was easily old enough to be the mother of many of the other seven contestants. Maybe her enthusiasm came from not being back home on the Massachusetts coast for this winter weather. For her efforts, she took home a trophy, $500 in cash, and the right to be addressed as “your majesty” for the rest of her life.

In the past, winners’ names were painted on a signboard above Stan’s dining room, but Hilt said that since Hurricane Ian, “that board is somewhere in the mangroves, and we haven’t found it yet.” The best costume winner, who collected a $300 prize, was Deb Aiello, also from Gloucester, who was essentially anonymous, with her outfit covering her from head to toe in feathers, including buzzard feet, until she removed her mask after the contest.

Saylor Peel, a local Goodland girl, won the Buzzard Princess competition on Saturday, despite having a cast on her leg. The rain and the cold kept her competition away, which helped.

This was the 42nd annual Mullet Festival at Stan’s. Along with the beer consumed, which Steve Gober estimated at 300 cases, plus liquor and wine, the menu featured mullet, fried, blackened or as mullet tacos, “and it’s all local – from right around Goodland.” The Professional Firefighters of Marco Island sold hot dogs and bratwurst as a benefit from a stand outside, making enough smoke to get their on-duty brethren called out.